Only Me
by Yui Miyamoto
Summary: At the park, Shuichi reflects what he's going to about his lyrics being insulted by a random jerk.


**Fandom: Gravitation  
Title: Only Me.  
Rating: pg  
Pairing: Shu + Hiro, Yuki ? Shu  
Description: At the park, Shuichi reflects what he's going to about his lyrics being insulted by a random jerk.**

**Disclaimer: If this were mine, I'd be rich, but I'm not and wish not to make money off this fanfic anyway. I just do it in appreciation for fun anime that I happen to like. ^_^**

**Only Me.  
by Yui Miyamoto  
**

In the dead of evening where only the lamps of the park were shining, I wanted to take a walk. Time didn't matter to me. The park was the park and as always, it had comforted me in every way possible.  
I don't remember how many times I ran away into it and just sat on a bench to sit and think. I don't even remember the first time I came here. But for some strange reason, I always seemed to end up at this park...

_/"Let's just stay here, Hiro." But I didn't even wait for him to say anything and just sat down tiredly on the nearest bench I found.  
"Aw, come on, we're not even home yet, Shuichi." He stood there with an also tired face, but knew that if he sat down, he wouldn't get up. "Shuichi."  
Shaking my head, I whined, "Don't wanna go. And I don't care what you say this time. That practice was too much!"  
With hands up to his sides, he sighed. "Fine, fine. You win."  
Smiling, I leaned on his shoulder. "So sleepy..."  
"You seem to like knowing you can push me a little, don't you, Shuichi?" He smirked and kept quiet.  
"Who? Me?" I crinkled my nose at him and closed my eyes. "No, I just know you'll give in."  
"Same thing."  
"Ne, Hiro?" I mumbled.  
"Yeah?"  
"Do you think we can make it?"  
"Why are you asking a stupid question like that? Of course we'll make it!"  
I got off his shoulder and patted his head. Wistfully, I smiled to say, "Yeah, we will, won't we?"  
_

_And yet again, Hiro hit me on the head. "I think we better go home because you're already getting delusional."  
"Too tired though..."  
"Geez..." Hiro again shook his head in disapproval and put my hand on his shoulder as he held my waist. "We're going home."  
"Hai, hai." I nodded off a bit but smiled at him again./_

"I remember that moment," I said as I looked up to the stars while sitting on the park bench. "Hiro said we could make it. I believed in it too. I truly believed in that, even until now."

_/With a pencil on my ear and biting the end of the eraser of another, I laughed at the piece of paper in front of me. After many many changes to so many songs, I finally found inspiration to write one that made a bit more sense than the others._

_Still, I sweatdropped at the lyrics in front of me. I shookmy head. "There's something missing. A feeling, an emotion...what is it?!"  
Then, I sighed in frustration. "AACK! I don't know!"_

_What the hell did I know about love?! And what more, I had to write about it?!  
_

_I couldn't even think of the lyrics as a poem! It was always a war between what I wanted to say and how it came out. And yet again, another crumbled sheet flew into the trash can near the  
bench...as with five down the road. Eh heh heh..._

_I just wanted to shout and say "I give up!", but I couldn't. I was holding onto Hiro's and my dream. I believed in us.._

_And so, inspired again, I scribbled like mad./_

"But all in one felt swoop, it went to ash, like cigarette." I began to shake again and wrapped my arms around my knees. "He had no right to tell me that! No right! That jerk!"

Again, I screamed to the sky for the umpteenth time in that hour since that stupid guy left me gawking behind him.

"Comes out of nowhere..." I shook even harder and clenched my fists. "Comes out of nowhere and tells me my lyrics are like a child's?! Tells me I have no talent?! Who the hell does he think he is?!"

Again and again, that stupid moment that happened only a while ago left me very shaken. If he had wanted to ruin my world, he did a very thorough job of it. Very thorough...  
If it weren't for the fact that I was confused whether I was more angry and pissed off with him or at myself. Seriously, I believed him.

I jumped out of the bench suddenly and screamed to the sky, "Why do I believe that bastard of a stranger than Hiro and even myself?! Why?! WHY?!"  
I fell to the ground. My knees had given out on me again. "In my moment of greatness, for actually finishing lyrics, he had to crush me."

A shiver ran through my spine. That look...that cold look.

I could have thought it was kind of a joke or shrugged it off like all the other people I had encountered to get this far, but for this guy, it was different. His eyes looked straight at me. He  
didn't avoid my eyes and even saw past me. But I think people who are ice can see through things like that, ne? * sigh *

So what if I wasn't the greatest person, singer, lyricist, whatever, but I didn't give up...I didn't!

I got up and cried on the bench again. "I guess what bothered me the most was that he looked at me the way he had looked at my lyrics, as if I were trash too. Someone unworthy of his time."

And an ache in my heart became much larger with that thought. In denial, I shook my head. "Only me...I want him to see only of me."

I want him to accept my work. Maybe it's because he was the first besides Hiro to see it, but maybe not...

An hour ago, it had started as a plan to make this guy eat out of the palm of my hand. To make him see that he was wrong and maybe look at him or crush him the way he had done to me...But no. No, I want him to accept me. I don't know why, but I want him to. I want him to remember this day about that boy he saw in the park that he had said all those mean things to.

I began to laugh. "Gosh, that's twisted."  
I wanted to cry, but I couldn't anymore. Maybe we were meant to meet for a reason...

"Whoever he is..." Again, I laughed to myself as I hugged my knees harder, "I think I'm in love with that bastard."  
"So this is what love feels like, huh?" I got up and smiled at myself both in sadness and happiness. "Then I guess I'll have to find him, now won't I?"

As I put my hands into my pockets and held onto the lyrics that the jerk had insulted, I looked at the sky full of stars. I whispered quietly to myself, "I...I think I can write lyrics now."

**Owari. / The End.**

**Author's note: **I didn't know it, but I guess I unconsciously liked the HiroxShu pairing. I guess I'm one of those angsty people that like to write sad stuff, but hey, that's how I first started learning about and writing Ranma fanfics. I like the dark ones. ^_^  
Just to let you know, if it weren't for Isshi Enma's encouragement, I don't think I would have made a Gravi fic this soon. ^_~

Hope you enjoyed!

**September 18, 2001**


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